Parenthood

So after a reasonably good night's sleep, I have decided to ramble again, not sure if the sleep was from writing yesterday or the lovely pink stuff I drank after a few days of abstinence. Matters not.

So today's little musings are as a result of being a parent, a particular type of parent I think. I am not an expert on this job role and have never claimed to be, I was handed the job purely through luck but will be eternally grateful. There are though some very tough decisions to be made along this road we're travelling together as a family and although people do sometimes ask me for advice, I have never been too proud to ask for help or advice from others when necessary.
I have always felt that "this age" is the hardest, of course "this age" changes day by day, just when you think you have the baby blues banished, along come the terrible two's. Then just when you're on top of those, I think Master Sporty was 15 when we managed that with him, oh no, hang on, maybe not.... I digress, then come the early school years, then starting secondary school and on it goes.

I hope that in general Mr Grumpy and I have done a reasonably good job with our boys and I'm sure it's down to the balance of our parenting skills or as it can otherwise be known, good cop, bad cop. Poor Mr Grumpy tends to get landed with the bad cop role but it seems only fair as he is very good at it! People warned us along the way that we shouldn't try to be friends with our boys, they're our children, not our friends. What a load of rubbish. They are brilliant friends and fantastic sons, it's just making sure we don't blur the boundaries, this is where I think the type of parents we are becomes relevant.

As our boys have grown in to fine young men, so of course have their desires and requirements. Knowing how much rope to give them has been the biggest test of our lives, because of course we don't want them to hang themselves. We have encouraged them in their past times, ferried them wherever necessary and hopefully tried to help them to be individuals and not follow the crowd. So when Master Sporty declared he wanted his ear piercing, naturally I told him that I was against the idea, but when he was old enough to take himself then it was up to him. I also reminded him though, that nearly every other lad that he goes to school with has their ear pierced, would it not be better to be different? His choice and I really don't mind if he does, but is that me being too laid back as a parent or should I forbid it?
Another example was brought home to us last night and has made me question my parenting skills. Master Sporty was invited to a lads night in at a friends house. Alcohol was allowed and so I let him take 4 small bottles of beer as well as some money to club in with the others for a takeaway. Of course he went with very strict instructions of my expectations of his behaviour whilst in someone else's home and that when he'd had his beer, was not to go wandering, especially near the river!
So imagine my surprise when the phone rang at some unearthly hour, to say that all the boys were being asked to leave, as the man of the house had had some of his alcohol taken. Not a problem that he was coming home but could his friend sleep over at ours as he couldn't go home.
Being the parents we are, of course we let the friend stay, what sort of person would I be, leaving a 15 year old out on the streets? Well at this point I can tell you I would have been a happier one, or certainly Mr Grumpy would have been.
It would seem that this friend is not very good at holding his beer and I don't mean with his hand. He obviously also has poor spacial awareness as he managed to completely miss the bowl next to him and vomited all over the floor.
So remember how I said I had a lovely sleep? Poor Mr Grumpy didn't, he was up until after 2am clearing up.
Also remember I said the friend couldn't go home? It would seem the reason was because his parents were asleep. Really? So were we until you rang to come home and then your orally artistic friend started decorating the bathroom and your bedroom floor!

So the question remains, are we too soft for letting our son do the things that make him happy? Or are we too soft for allowing his friends to stay over when really they could and should have gone home? I'm not sure there's an easy answer to it and I'm pretty sure there's no right or wrong answer, all I know is that if either of my boys are going to make decisions to do something, whether I like it or not, I'd rather that they were in the safety of our home, knowing that we'll always be here for them.

Be aware though, I do have a tolerance level and clearing up puke is just over that level, so don't bring your pukey friends here again, next time get him to wake up his obviously very strict parents that wouldn't have approved of him being drunk!

Enjoy your weekend people.

Spring Clean

Well hello again, I think, is anybody there? I realised that apart from my one off Summer special last year, it is actually almost a year since I last rambled.

Much has happened in the last 12 months, most of which I'm sure you know about, but for those that don't, tough, you probably wouldn't really be interested anyway!

So what prompted me to start again you may wonder? Well I'm not too sure, other than I can't seem to sleep at the moment, my mind is full of thoughts and so I figured that if I wrote some of them down I might at least start getting some kip at night!

Firstly I must update the names of the players in my life, Master Musical is now doing quite well for himself and so I guess can be upgraded to Mr Musical, that and the fact that he is actually an adult after all! Master Grumpy still has the odd blip of grumpiness but has earned the title of Master Sporty, I am very proud of all his sporting achievements, long may they continue. As for Mr Grumpy, well, a bit like the relationship Emily had with Bagpuss, he's still grumpy, saggy and a bit loose at the seams, but I love him.

So with Easter passing and all things Spring like happening, I came to wonder why we Spring clean? Let's face it, we don't only clean in Spring do we? Especially not in this house, Mr Grumpy and his OCD means that he's always attacking anything that sits still long enough, with a duster or a toothbrush and a dab of limelite or bleach!

So the Spring clean of my type began this week, clearing out my knicker drawer. I have to admit that the drawer had got to a state of fullness beyond compare, bit like my knickers at times... Anyway, it couldn't be avoided any longer, a good thinning out was needed and a morning alone seemed the perfect opportunity to attack the beast beside my bed.

As I plonked them all on the floor, I was amazed at what I found, knickers from maybe 23 years ago sat there looking at me, asking me why? Why did you buy us and never wear us? I'm beginning to wonder why myself! Some of the most, (ha, I actually did a typo there and put moist, changed it) ridiculous pieces of undergarments I have ever seen in my life! How did I ever think anything that frilly, that lacy, that loose, that tight or with that written on it would ever look good on my lower, nether regions?

The only positive thing that I did gain from the clear out, other than more drawer space, was that I'm actually still wearing the same size undies as I was all those years ago, yep, always had a big arse then!

So what had driven me to save these pieces of apparel for all of these years? Who knows, an aversion to tidying? Clinging on to the past and the memories of those undies? Something to throw on the stage when very excited at a gig? No, I think it was maybe the fear of them being discovered in my wheelie bin and being put on a teddy that you see pinned to the front of the bin lorry, a big sign on the front saying, "Thanks Lady at Number 8!"

Happy Friday everybody!